Ready, set... you can hold your line, right?

Turns out that riding around isn't anywhere near as fun as riding around in a circle at really fast speeds (crit racing).

Kinda looks a bit like the picture below, probably they're professionals and probably they're not the E Graders that I raced with..

Things like this can happen, this is called fucking up and not holding your line... learn from your mistakes. The peloton will learn from your mistakes and drop your fucking arse...

Mostly they don't end up like that, or at least they didn't when I raced, it was more like perfection, HTC perfection... lead out train, swish hey, *sigh*.

Followed by, "Yeah, woooo hoooooo."

And then, "your the best team mate in the world..."

And then... yeah okay, real men can cry to. See that bottom lip quivering? And the sooky eyes?

And then some fried brioche at Hardware Societie (sp? I'm not checking its tooo late and I have a lecture at 8am... ethics at 8am, seriously not cool). Okay, I ended up F7 it.

So, that's pretty much what happens at a criterium, POMA dropped by and watched me race, I spent too much time on the front and learnt a lesson from that.

Don't.

I also learnt that I need to do more sprint work, other than that the speed of E Grade men is apparently faster than B Grade women, so I'll go join B Grade women next week and hopefully we don't see any of this...

The Hard Men of Cycling - Cpical, Hannos, Madgan and Russell!

Playing domestique to a group of men is a little nerving, especially when you hear the words, "Your gonna make someone a really good wife one day." That hadn't been the aim...

We rode out of Bright with 6:20am group, the sun was barely up and we had taken our bikes back to the end of the peloton. Hannos was excited; his shiny red BMC-something-something gleamed in the early morning light. Picture below is of Hannos with his BMC-something-something that needed a new crankset... the night before. Who knows SRAM Red?

Fitting a SRAM Red Crankset... minor-last-minute-mechanical-detail

Cpical... I know, I know, its blurry.

Cpical, as always was calm, it was just a ride, it would be fine... pace yourself and you will be okay.

Another of my favorite sayings from Cpical, "no, it will be fine."

and

"It is okay." or "Yes, it was hard."

Magdan (below) was looking forward to the ride, sure, his daughters think he was riding in the tour down under, I don't think we'll tell them that it was with a bunch of hacks, professional hacks are even worse.

Madgan was under strict instructions, "no jokes whilst riding uphill..."

Russell (bellow) had been positive from the get-go and new the time he had to qualify in for some-really-really-long-arsed-Audax-ride-in-Pars-that-would-probably-give-you-saddle-sores thing. As we rolled out to climb Tawonga Gap there was mentions of this mystical metal called steel that almost no longer exists and is only found in places like Brunswick, Fitzroy and St Kilda... its NOT real.

I decided on the way up Tawonga Gap that my day would end at the hotel in Mt Beauty, my mind couldn't see the finish line, I couldn't imagine it and I wasn't ready to push myself through that much pain. I decided that rest was on the cards and I would also be able to organise things for dinner and not be rushed. A much nicer experience for everyone this time around.

I met Steve (below) as I was going up Tawonga Gap, I was in the big ring... um, I didn't look and I couldn't figure out why it hurt so much, my bad. Steve had started his 10th Alpine Classics that day, he's done pretty much every Audax ride you can imagine. Today wasn't going to be the 10th for him, he wasn't well so I went up with him to the top of Tawonga and suggested that he come back to Mt Beauty with me and I would make some toast and tea.

Steve... the ring in and newest member!

Meanwhile the boys (men) had probably been working their arses of up Falls Creek, their enthusiasm has been outstanding, their personalities had been eye opening and a pleasure to experience.

EVENTUALLY... okay, it wasn't that long, they all arrived back at the hotel.

Madgan's rule had been not to sit down or else he wouldn't get up again, Cpical finally found his competition (if he was in to competition.. which he isn't), in the way of Hannos and that BMC-something-something, Russell's consistency is something that I haven't been able to master yet, perhaps its my youth which holds me back?

I went about refuelling water bottles and making sure everyone was okay, Russell was first out the door knowing all well and good about the time limits that faced him and if he cooled down before the climb over Tawonga Gap he'd suffer even more up Mt Buffallo, I sent Steve off with Russell in the hopes that he would have some company going up the hill.

I was told stories about the impressive wobble in that BMC-something-something as it descended from the top of Falls Creek; only to hear later that Hannos hadn't taken his wind vest with him for the descent thinking he'd be fine. He froze most of the way down and only heated up about 5km from the bottom of Falls Creek.

I considered climbing Falls Creek once the boys left but decided that I deserved the break, I filled the bath and spent an hour looking at the mountain before enjoy an hours sleep.

Princess Missy....

Cpical updated me on their progress once they had reached Mt Buffalo, its the last climb of the day and its the hottest time of the day. I was happy to receive the text messages telling me that each of the boys had made it to the top. They had all done such a good job and it was only a matter of time before they where home.

Hannos was the first in, followed by Cpical and Madgan, and last but not least Russell... who'd stopped for coke.

Special thanks to Steve for taking the photo of all the current members who could make it, obviously you can see the core team who did the 200km. POMA is also featured in the picture, he completed the raid this time, having proven himself capable the year before.

Russell, Hannos, Cpical, Missy, POMA, and Madgan

Drinks where had, stories where told of seeing those magical steel demons, 404's battled sticks and survived, whilst the fly that followed Hannos up Mt Buffalo meet its demise as we departed from a little place called Dreamers.

Mt Donna Buang; I dream of her often.

I think Mt Donna Buang was the first mountain I'd climb, it was either that or the 1:20, I'm not sure... but you know the storey behind it. We discussed it in the previous post.

Madgan and I where there on Sunday, we hadn't left early which was fine, I understand that other people have commitments, that sometimes I'm lucky to be able to just do what I want. 

You go to a mountain to climb and its what we did, I'd never ridden it with a Garmin before, so to know the first 6km - 7km was full of climbing that involved 8% to 15% gave me a shock.

First time back to Mt Donna Buang in 1 year and 16 days, the climb had never hurt so much, the heat was horrid and my calves where cramping and my feet where hot... new shoes, new saddle; makes an interesting mix for the first day back up a mountain.

The first time I climbed Mt Donna Buang the time was 2hours and 1minute, it sticks in my head because Gunlock beat me by a minute... no more and no less.

Mt Donna Buang for the uninitiated is 16km and an average of 6.2%.

Madgan climbed well, he was worried, he's gonna kick it at the Alpine Classics... it'll be good training for the cycle leg of all those Tri's he does... right?

I must count him as one of the best I've ever climbed with, Madgan and Pical take the cake, they are gentleman and my friends. We are so lucky to have them on this team, I'm so lucky to have the both of them...

Just in case you thought I was lying... there's no proof, I was there and so was Madgan, my calves still hurt and the summit is burnt into my eyes, I know where it is ,I know where I crashed... I know that Mountain and I will get my 1 hours 15 minute time back this year.

I'll train all winter. Thanks Assos.

Psike - Steel is real... *insert rolling eyes smilie*

In recent days there has been a lot of trash talk on my facebook page regarding the choices of new bikes and what to buy; especially in the lead up to the Alpine Classics. There's a lot of bling on the market and no doubt we all have different tastes, I just wanted to start out by saying, "Steel isn't real."

Due to the large amounts of trash talk, I thought it about time that I introduce Psike, he's from Canberra, the nations capital, so its fair to say in all honesty that he knows... nothing, right?

Not entirely, he does know something about HTFU though, it would take a while to mention all the Audax rides that he has done, and there has been a few, so I'm not gonna bother, it would probably also make me feel slow and sucky (not far from the truth). 

Psike has thoroughly suggested that I HTFU a little bit and stop sooking that I haven't be able to ride because I got hit by a car and wrote of my bike and therefor haven't been able to train and did I mention that my mother broke her ankle and I'm looking after her?

Breath.

However, Hannos, just got a new bike, a 2010 BMC SLC01  and to top it off, he had some beautiful Zipp 404 Clinchers to make it hotter and sexier. Which lets face it, 404's are hot; sure those who don't have them say they're too heavy and not to mention the word that they're over priced... I don't need a man, I just need a new bike every six months and some 404's, perhaps an upgrade to Di2 when I graduate from University in a million years and a pink helmet.

I'm about to take possession of a 2011 Felt AR4, its got full Ultegra, which is what I'm happy with, I was tossing up between the Felt and the 2011 Cannondale SuperSix, but I didn't want the Tecktro breaks and the FSA Cranks that came on the 'Dale. I've heard the 2011 Felt AR3 (SRAM) is stiff and fast; looking forward to having carbon between my legs again. I've been off the bike since the 14th of December. My new 404 clincher shouldn't be far away, and I'll be the proud owner of a very nice looking bike, lickable even... don't ask.

As you can see there's a lot of hormones and carbon floating through facebook, twitter and the odd internet forum (helmets rule), I think ultimately we're living out our fantasy's on our bikes and this seems to include lots and lots of riding (take it as you choose). Psike has decided to take the piss out of our carbon bling and sexy wheels, jealous is a green eyed monster.

I really can't take the piss out of him too much cause I have a feeling that he'll be providing a lot of the motivation to get me and Hannos through the Alpine Classics, even with our carbon and 404's we're actuall riding at the speed of snails. 

Psike's position in this team was thoroughly discussed amongst the team and it went something like this.

I said, "this dude Psike from the forums is gonna come to and he's done lots of Audax rides and is awesome!"

Hannos said, "who?"

Cpical said, "okay."

Madgan said, "sure... what are the sleeping arrangements?"

That's how careful our consideration is when it comes to choosing team members, ultimately I seem to have the final say, I'm not sure why, could be because of my amazing influence on others or my hard work and determination.

Psike has said that he doesn't care how long it takes as long as he's in within the time limit, so that puts us at a maximum of about 13 hours, worst case scenario.

As long as there is a bottle of Patricia (Brown Brothers) at the Penthouse at the end of the day, I'm easy. I'll find a picture of Psike later in his hat, I'll steal something from facebook and deface it as much as possible.

Only about two weeks until we all attempt to kill ourselves and I just read recently that that Bling kid does about 1000km a week...

Hannos - The first sucker to join from NSW

Hannos and I know each other pretty well, we email each other almost daily, I complain and he listens diligently and tells me that my ideas are awesome, hence the reason for this cycling team... a good idea according to Hannos. I'm sure I have an email around here that backs up that last statement, I will provide it if required.

This is Hannos, to the right, he says and I quote, "I don't take very good self portraits."

I have to be honest, I bullied the man into signing up for the Alpine Classics, told him it would be great fun, a piece of cake, there is ONLY 4 climbs.

Hannos has never done 200km not even on the flat, so to add some mountains into it could be a whole different effect; Hannos also runs and swims so his overall fitness is going to be better than mine.

The big thing and big issue at the moment is that I got hit by a car before Christmas and wrote of a bike, I'm waiting on a replacement and some money from an insurance company, so until then I'm swimming and running and I'm trying to eat better.

Hannos has told me to HTFU (Harden The F*ck Up) and I'm going to HTFU, I don't want to let them down. It was my encouragement that got us all here and my encouragement that got people who I really don't know (face to face) to come to Bright and ride together as a team that would always wait at the top of every mountain; climb at your own pace.

Hannos is essential to this team and its the team that will get a few of us whose health and ability actually sucks at the moment.

The First Cap

The idea came about when I decided that I wanted something to commemorate the 2011 Alpine Classics team that I had put together. I wanted something that was inexpensive that we could all afford and with the cost of good quality Lycra these days being on par with a good pair of Italian shoes I thought caps would be the go.

The designer is Susan from http://www.rocketfuel.net.au/, I gave her my ideas and she bought them to life

The cap has the name of our team on the side HackPRO Cycling Team and our sponsor, Clenbuterol and Spanish Beef, big thanks to Clenbuterol and the Spanish Beef Industry for keeping us going.

On the right hand side we have 2011, to commemorate the ride in 2011.

All the caps have each persons name underneath the brim, as you can see from this picture my name is Missy.

I look forward to introducing you to the members of the team as we have our first rides together, most people are going to stay anonymous and use different names, we are after all just a bunch of Professional Hack who like riding... some of them also like swimming and running.

The only person I have so far promised not to take the piss out of is Madgan, he promised to stop kicking my arse on Beach Road if I didn't take the piss out of him.

Champ, well, we discussed his name last night on the phone, he'd been telling me how he met Richie Porte in Launceston the other night and he said he wanted to be called Bear, after that dude with the TV show. He also mentioned that he once had a Care Bear called Champ, so instead of totally humiliating him with the name Care Bear, I had considered it, but I do value our friendship so I'll call him Champ.

I posted all the caps out yesterday at lunchtime, everyone should recieve them today and I look forward to hearing some feedback.... Oooooo red caps!